The Shared Memory Connecting Me to DI Nigella Parker
I was once asked during an author interview whether I see anything of myself in the characters from And by Fire? My answer was an unequivocal yes.
I feel a very deep connection to the heroine in my novel’s modern timeline, DI Nigella Parker of the City of London Police. One that I created by giving her one of my childhood memories. Nigella’s fear of fire is grounded in my own.
The house address, and the names of the victims that sparked Nigella’s fictional fear of fire may be different, but the core story at the root that fear is identical to the real-life incident that sparked my own.
When I was in elementary school, a local ranch-style brick home burned. I still remember watching the news coverage. Being struck by the fact that while the outside of the home looked virtually normal—other than windows broken by the firefighters—the inside had been transformed into a haunting and terrifying tableaux of scorched walls and burned furniture. Somehow that contrast made the whole thing even more frightening.
The real tragedy linked to the fire was that two little girls—awakened at night by the fire and terrified—hid in a bedroom closet rather than running out of the house. Their parents couldn’t’ find them. By the time the firemen did it was too late. Neither sister could be saved. The sisters’ deaths generated a life-long fear of fire in me. Their deaths turned death by fire into the very last way I’d ever want to die.
Why pass that fear along to Nigella? I knew it would create an unbreakable bond between us—creator and created. I also understood that by specifically giving her the origin story of my own fear there would be a part of her character that I would always be able to access and write about realistically.
Fortunately, DI Parker and I have a similar approach to things that cause us anxiety—we try to kick them in the teeth (metaphorically). What you can’t conquer destroys you—Nigella has that thought in And by Fire, it’s a mantra for her. It is also mine. Since the tragic fire-related death of those Ohio sisters, I’ve never lived anywhere without a rehearsed fire escape plan. You will always find a fire blanket in my kitchen. My smoke detectors never have low batteries.
On a less serious note, Ni and I share something else: a pair of favorite perfumes. Ironically each of those scents have underlying notes of smoke. I didn’t realize that until I began writing And by Fire. Once I did, I decided to wear one of them (Iris Cendre by Naomi Goodsir) while drafting the novel. I sprayed it on whenever I needed to slip into the skin of my main character.
